Tag...your it!

My friend Jen tagged me with this trip down memory lane! My memory is terrible but I will do my best!



20 years ago 1988

1. 8th grade-I ran and won a successful campaign for student council

2. Injured my knee dancing and had surgery

3. Had my first kiss



10 years ago 1998

1. Celebrated my 1st year of motherhood

2. Was called as the secretary for Primary

3. Worked at Purple Pig Pizza



5 years ago 2003

1. Matthais turned six and started Kindergarten

2. Ian received his Autism diagnosis and started preschool

3. Millie turned one



1 year ago 2007

1. started my weight loss journey...again

2. Started running... again

3. Rode the Polar express with my kids at Christmas time



So far this year2008

1. Ran my first half-marathon

2. met my Weight watchers goal

3. Been to St. George twice



Yesterday June 24th

1. Cleaned for summer get together

2. ran 5 miles

3. my kids made me crazy



Today June 25th

1. I plan on a 5 mile run with Micheale

2. Hosted a summer get together

3. crashed after said get together



Tomorrow June 27th

1. Camping at Mutual Dell

2. Going to Wheeler farm for Daycare training

3. Visiting teachers are coming



Next year 2009

1. celebrate my 14th wedding anniversary

2. run the Wasatch back with 12 of my closest friends (any takers?)

3. finally have friends in my new ward

Ok, so now I tag Micheale, Shauna, Kris and Rachel (notice they are the only other friends I have that blog...I'm a bloser; a blog loser!)

The casualties of Ian

The following are listed among the known casualties of Ian in the last 7 days alone. I am not exaggerating either.


3 fish. We've had 2 of these fish for AT LEAST 8 years. He decided they were hungry and needed the entire bottle of food.

a bottle of Windex. On the kitchen table

a container of Juice. Minutes after I brought it home from the store; not-so-carefully poured into 6 cups and one dirty pitcher.

my flowers on the front porch. Lovingly picked and passed to Owen through the open window.

The chipboard "E" from Emilia. When I painted Millie's room a few months ago I bought the letters to spell her name on the wall. This was no simple task since the letters had been discontinued and I went to 3 Roberts to get her whole name.

a package of pumpkin seeds. We'll have pumpkins this year after all...just don't know where they will grow from.

a bottle of straitening serum. Dumped down the sink so he could use the bottle to spray Emilia with water.

an entire bottle of syrup. The amount you need for one pancake on a stick.

His hair. Yes, we has a repeat of a few weeks ago. He cut his hair to the scalp again.

bottle of shampoo. The tub needed more bubbles.


The following were only wounded in battle


my mp3 player. Completely my fault. I let him listen to it because it is one of the few things that will keep him entertained for more than 2 minutes. It still works on half volume.

The back porch. It was in desperate need of watering...Ian was only helping

The second bottle of juice- survived several spills and still hanging on

A book- unfortunately, not ours, the libraries. But..it's just a few tears...I think it will make it


Who knew I lived in a war zone? Oh wait...I did.

It's what fun is....

LAGOON! We had so much fun at lagoon on Saturday. We always do! I get so excited just like a kid every time we go. Ian wore one of his Autism shirts and I'm glad since he had a fit anytime we had to wait. The worst was when we waited in line 25 minutes for the mini-dragon coaster. He cried the whole time wanting to get on. When it finally our turn to get on he refused. He had just gone on jet star 2 and was too scared to ride the dragon. I was not happy to say the least. Also not happy that rattlesnake rapids was closed; that is a family favorite. but...with season passes again this year we will be sure to get a chance to ride it. I'm already looking forward to our next trip!

I'm an addict...I know...

I can't help it. I love diet coke. First thing in the morning. last thing at night. Any time the kids are driving me crazy, just give me my diet coke. I blame it on my mom who drank it when I was a kid therefore I drank it.

It's just sad that now my almost 2 year old asks for diet coke when he's thirsty. Seriously. The thing is, he's never even tasted it. But he can pick it out in any store and cries if I don't buy it. Obviously he sees my addiction and wants to feed it. Or maybe I'm just raising the next generation of diet coke heads. But hey, it's 99% water! who can complain about that?

Coming to a Old Navy near you

Next time you visit the Old Navy in Am Fork you might be surprised to see this symbol over my picture. That's right. I am sure to be banned from Old Navy. I ran there this morning to return some flip flops I bought for Owen (I figured why does a kid who won't wear shoes need more than one pair?). I spot Liz there and am so happy to see her since she now lives in North Carolina. Of course where there is Liz, there is bound to be Janelle also and she is a favorite as well. I'm doing my usual chatting and ignoring the 21 month-old as he runs around being obnoxious. I'm thinking, compared to how he acts at Wal-mart he's being an angel. Out of the corner of my eye I see the employees with their "get your kid in control" looks but I ignore them, I'm busy for heavens sake! But, then I get the look I can't ignore. It's the "oh my heck where is your mom!" look. I peek around the corner to find Owen sitting on the floor naked in a puddle of pee. Yep. That's how the potty training's going so far. So I ask for a bag and some paper towels and clean up. Janelle gives me a diaper and I calmly leave completely embarrassed, hoping I won't have to ever show my face in Old Navy again. But alas, I have to revel in my humility. I can't find my keys. I have to go back in and look. The first thing the girl mopping up the pee says is "boy, it's sure not your day!" All I can say in response is "it never is." Turns out the keys were in the van after all. What can I say? Life is always interesting at my house.

My new best friend

I am so excited. My Garmin will be here tomorrow. Thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU to my wonderful husband who decided to let me buy this. I can't wait to test it out!

Potty time

Now that Ian is back in school I decided it was time to go ahead and start the potty training. Owen is not quite two yet and I know it's still kinda early but since he'd rather not wear a diaper anyway I thought I'd go ahead. Things are going ok. He can accomplish #2 on the potty very well. He just hasn't gotten the hang of #1. Doesn't that seem backward? I hope that is a good sign and that he'll get it all figured out soon. The great thing is that he loves the potty. I just walked into my bathroom and saw him sitting on it. He climbed on all by himself with no stool and figure out how to stay on without his little Elmo potty seat. Not bad for day one.

101 things about me

I've seen this on a few other blogs and today I really need a reason to feel good about myself again so I'm gonna give it a try. Maybe you'll learn something new about me.

1. My dream was to be a dancer
2. In 8th grade I brought a boy from another school to school with me and told everyone he was my cousin. He went to several classes with me before we got caught.
3. I don't like vegetables
4. My kids and my husband are my life. I can't imagine it any other way
5. I have a tendency to get jealous of other people's close relationships.
6. I have a tendency to get jealous of other people's good fortune
7. I have a tendency to get jealous... a lot.
8. I secretly wish I could have given Millie a sister.
9. I was happy when my mom divorced her second husband.
10. I was mad when she married her third but I love him now.
11. I was indifferent when she married her fourth.
12. I'm much more comfortable being the hostess than the hosted.
13. I need me time everyday.
14. I love to learn and get excited when I accomplish something new.
15. I love taking and looking at pictures. Thank goodness for digital.
16. I am very moody
17. I don't deal well with disappointment
18. I used to be very shy but I'm not anymore
19. I used to be a girl scout
20. There is nothing like a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit for breakfast. MMMM
21. I once became a vegetarian to fit into a certain group. I did this for 2 years. Now look at #3 again.
22. I wish my sister lived closer
23. I still struggle with the same self-esteem issues I did as a teen
24. I'm very good at remembering faces. Names...not so much
25. I rarely shower. I much prefer to bath
26. I read the newspaper everyday and I never skip the obituaries
27. I wish I could play the piano
28. History fascinates me
29. I often dream about ghosts and hauntings
30. I never thought I'd actually enjoy running
31. I am the oldest of 13 sibs, half-sibs and step-sibs
32. Only one, my sister, is my full-blood sibling
33. I use clinical strength deodorant. It still doesn't work
34. The smell of pickles makes me gag
35. brushing my teeth makes me gag
36. I have a strong gag reflex and lots of things make me gag
37. I have strategically put toilet paper in places to enhance my figure
38. I was on the drill team in high school
39. I really wanted to be a cheerleader but didn't have the courage to try out
40. I am not a morning person
41. I'm not very good at it but I love gardening. Except for the weeds
42. I got married at 19 to my high school sweetheart
43. We've been married now 13 years
44. My first car was a 1979 ford mustang. My dad bought it for me from my aunt for $500. I sold it 2 years later for $500
45. my first job was at my dad's auto parts store. I worked there for 7 years. I still do paperwork for them at home
46. my second job at my in-laws pizza restaurant. I did that for 5 years
47. I've never been to a job interview since I've only worked for family
48. I've never had a speeding ticket
49. I have a diet coke almost everyday for breakfast
50. I used to be very catty
51. Sometimes I still am
52. My husband used to be my best friend's boyfriend. I was always the third wheel with them
53. I'm still the third wheel in many of my relationships
54. I went to two proms my jr. year in high school. I didn't really like either of my dates
55. I once ran a stop sign and hit a school bus full of students. (no one was hurt)
56. In 10th grade I sluffed everyday to eat lunch with my boyfriend
57. I almost completely failed out of the 10th grade.
58. I'm not comfortable with change
59. I'd talk on the phone all day if someone would talk to me that long.
60. I'm really good at starting projects
61. I'm not so good at finishing them
62. I have a hard time making friends
63. But, once I make them, I try to hold on to them forever
64. I sometimes Google people I went to High school with
65. Sometimes I even drive by their houses
66. I once participated in an egg assault on the home of my friend whose parents sent her to live with her uncle
67. I learned about the birds and the bees from a friend in 5th grade
68. I took AP classes in high school and scored really well on all the college placement exams
69. I had a really low GPA (see #57)
70. I once had a date abandon me at a party where I knew no one and I had to find a ride home
71. I've always wished I could sing
72. I love to read. I read all day long...the cereal box, the shampoo bottle, the classifieds...
73. I use the same guilt inducing tactics with my kids that my mom used with me
74. I have lots of good friends
75. I desperately want to be some one's best friend
76. I want to go back to college. I've always regretted not finishing
77. I'd rather be barefoot
78. I used to watch Star trek: next generation every night. I even made Adam watch.
79. I can't stand staying home and some days I'll get in the van and drive just to get out of my house
80. I have a reoccurring dream that it's time for me to graduate from high school but I haven't been in so long that I don't remember my schedule or locker combination.
81. My first kiss was in the sky ride at lagoon. I was in 8th grade.
82. I am not very confident and have a huge inferiority complex
83. I am so in love with my baby. Everything he does makes me smile
84. I have only had one calling outside of primary
85. I am not an animal person
86. I am scared of losing one of my children
87. I am scared of being alone
88. I tend to be needy and clingy
89. I once stole a bottle of nail polish from a friend and then pretended it "accidentally" fell into my sleeping bag at a sleepover when she called me on it.
90. I used to be afraid to sleep next to the window in my basement bedroom because I was convinced someone would shoot me through the window.
91. I once witnessed a car accident on the freeway. A man was thrown from his vehicle and died. I can still see him flying through the air
92. I am very sensitive and I cry often
93. I was a very bad influence on Adam in high school.
94. I feel bad about that and I'm glad he turned me around
95. If I could manage it, I would move to St. George
96. I tend to obsess about things I have no control over
97. I'm not very good with discipline. Either for myself or my children
98. I love my kids and I would have had 10 kids if I thought that I could mentally and emotionally have handled it.
99. I sometimes yearn for the simple days before kids
100. My biggest pet peeve is people who say they'll do something then don't
101. I think that over all I'm a good person. At least...I try

I desperately miss my old neighborhood.

Desperately. Things has been very hard for me lately and I've been trying to figure out why. And when I really think about it it's not just things lately...it's really been the last two years.Two years ago in August we moved less than a mile away but sometimes I feel as though we've left the country. I really haven't been the same since. Do you ever feel just so...I don't know...in limbo? Not really knowing where you belong? I know I don't belong here. But...I don't belong there either. I do a really good job pretending but deep down I know how miserable I feel. This is all old news to anyone who's taken 5 mins in the last 2 years to listen to me complain. I just can't seem to get past it. I've finally gotten over the anxiety I'd feel when I drove by my old neighborhood. I even walked through my old house and felt good about it. I thought that was what it would take to get over all my feelings. And, it felt good for a little while. I am so lonely here. I feel like I'm a pretty descent person, I feel like I'd be a pretty good friend, I feel like there are people here that I have things in common with...I just can't seem to connect to anyone. I really have tried. We've had people over. I've invited people out with me. I'm not shy. Still...there just isn't any connection. And meanwhile, life in my old neighborhood goes on without me. Some part of me wishes they missed me as much as I miss them, that they were as desperate for me as I was for them. Maybe then I'd feel needed again instead of just an afterthought. People move all the time. Heck, this isn't the first time I've moved. I just have such an emotional attachment to my old ward and neighborhood. It was our first house and really my first taste of independance. The first seven years of our marriage were spent in the ward Adam grew up in. His parents were still in that ward. I enjoyed a lot of great experiences there and made lots of great friends. But, I was always "Adam's wife" or "Jerry & Annette's daughter-in-law". Those are wonderful shadows to be in but when we moved to PG, I found part of me. The people I made friends with were my friends because of me...not because of anything else.I felt important and needed. And that felt good. I am desperate to feel that again.

Which Disney Princess are you?

You Are Belle!

Intelligent and kind. Your beauty goes much further than your apperance. Also, you make judgements of people based on their personality and not their looks. Attaining all the knowledge that you can is one of your major goals in life, but you are also a person who can make things happen.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

I've always been a fan of Belle!

I must be in a creative mood

I've been talking about making these t-shirts for Ian for years now. I finally got some of them done today. These are for our summer adventures. If you can't read them they say "Staring at me will not cure my Autism", "I have autism, what's your excuse" and "Autism: Always under the infulence" Hopefully by having him wear these I will avoid some unwanted attention. There are a few yet to be made including "What? is my Autism showing?" and "Autism is not contagious. Intolerance is". I even thought about doing one for myself; "my son has autism. smiles are appreciated...parenting advice is not" I hope they speak for themselves.

diaper cake

I made this fun diaper cake for my sister-in-law Jen's baby shower. It was fun and I like how it turned out especially since I have about zero creativity and since I was I was on a tight budget.

I need a new alarm clock!

First of all it's never very reliable. It goes off sometime between 6:00 and 6:45. The thing is that I know I set it everyday for 7:30. It doesn't really have snooze button although sometimes if I turn on Caillou I'll get another 5 or 10 minutes. The radio on it is broken and instead it wakes me with a whiny "MOOOOOOM! I Waaaaant some Ceeeereal!" noise. If that doesn't work it climbs on me and pulls my hair. Sometimes I physically remove it from my room just for 10 more minutes of sleep. Problem is...it has a back-up. If I'm not careful, and if I don't turn it off with just the right button...the first alarm alerts the back-up alarm and it goes off. The back-up alarm is less whiny and more like an alarm should sound but instead of "beep, beep, beep" it sounds more like "mom, mom, mom," This one gets me out of bed instantly because it has a wetting feature when left au natural. Sometimes I can turn this one off with some cuddles and some curious George but the second back-up alarm won't let me sleep much longer. If I try to go back to sleep the third alarm senses it and pretty soon I hear a "knock, knock, knock" "knock, knock, knock, mom, what's for breakfast" Some mornings I'm ready to chuck the whole darn thing out the window! It's suppose to be the lazy days of summer after all! I either need to get to bed earlier or learn how to reprogram my alarm clock. I'd much rather do the latter.

I used to be a cutsie mom...

You know the type. Cute hair, cute make-up, cute clothes and cute kids. The type that doesn't even check the mail without being dressed to a T. When Matthais was a baby I was this mom. We used to hop in our cute little car and head to the mall with the two of us all decked out and I would parade him around in out cute little stroller. It was always so much fun. I even continued the tradition when Ian came along only this time my cute little stroller was a double. Yesterday Owen and I ventured off to the mall something I haven't done in years. Before I left I pulled my hair back into a pony and thought about some make-up but decided I didn't want to take the time. I pulled in the lot in my big ole van. I got out, brushed the crumbs off and noticed I had mud on my jeans. I got Owen out wiped the orange off his face but couldn't do anything about the orange on his shirt and pants. I scrambled around on the van floor looking for a pair of matching shoes for him. He had to have shoes cause I didn't bring a stroller...it is covered in cat hair. As I walked through the mall I noticed all these cute little moms with matching diper bags and strollers. Their kids are clean and their hair is combed and the moms look fabulous. I am defiantly that mom in the Suave commercial who has let herself go. If you're interested in seeing it go to www.suave.com click on beauty, then click on full circle. I opt for sweats almost everyday of the week. I shower maybe every other day. Hair and make up? forget about it. Poor Adam. I really should give him something he can be excited to come home to. But unfortunately a bottle of shampoo is not going to do it. I'm the only one that can make this happen. So today I'm gonna commit to a shower, make-up, cutsie hair and clean, un-sweat-type clothes. The house and kids might be a mess but today I'm not going to be. Adam might even come home and wonder where I'm going all decked out. Lucky him...I'm staying home and I'm pretty!

2 down and counting

Ok, I admit it. I am not one of those moms who loves to have her kids home for summer. I dread the summer break. If it makes me a bad mom...so be it. I love my kids; I just don't love the messes, the fighting, the crying, the entertaining, the meltdowns, the chatter, the constant play dates, the noise, etc. I am surviving though. Today started out poopy...literally (Sometimes I wonder if Ian is actually toilet trained)! And it's just gone on from there. I took Ian to Walmart (mistake) before he had his medication (bigger mistake)Uh...Duh! I'm asking for it when I do stupid things like that! I feel like we are still trying to get used to being with each other all day again. I'm hoping things will get better. They will get better right?