I desperately miss my old neighborhood.

Desperately. Things has been very hard for me lately and I've been trying to figure out why. And when I really think about it it's not just things lately...it's really been the last two years.Two years ago in August we moved less than a mile away but sometimes I feel as though we've left the country. I really haven't been the same since. Do you ever feel just so...I don't know...in limbo? Not really knowing where you belong? I know I don't belong here. But...I don't belong there either. I do a really good job pretending but deep down I know how miserable I feel. This is all old news to anyone who's taken 5 mins in the last 2 years to listen to me complain. I just can't seem to get past it. I've finally gotten over the anxiety I'd feel when I drove by my old neighborhood. I even walked through my old house and felt good about it. I thought that was what it would take to get over all my feelings. And, it felt good for a little while. I am so lonely here. I feel like I'm a pretty descent person, I feel like I'd be a pretty good friend, I feel like there are people here that I have things in common with...I just can't seem to connect to anyone. I really have tried. We've had people over. I've invited people out with me. I'm not shy. Still...there just isn't any connection. And meanwhile, life in my old neighborhood goes on without me. Some part of me wishes they missed me as much as I miss them, that they were as desperate for me as I was for them. Maybe then I'd feel needed again instead of just an afterthought. People move all the time. Heck, this isn't the first time I've moved. I just have such an emotional attachment to my old ward and neighborhood. It was our first house and really my first taste of independance. The first seven years of our marriage were spent in the ward Adam grew up in. His parents were still in that ward. I enjoyed a lot of great experiences there and made lots of great friends. But, I was always "Adam's wife" or "Jerry & Annette's daughter-in-law". Those are wonderful shadows to be in but when we moved to PG, I found part of me. The people I made friends with were my friends because of me...not because of anything else.I felt important and needed. And that felt good. I am desperate to feel that again.