Ian

Today we're heading up to Primary Children's Hospital for a MRI. This is the first in a series of tests to see if we can figure out what is going on with Ian. For the last several months life with Ian as become increasingly difficult. He started wetting his bed, then it was himself, and now he is in pull ups all day. If left alone in the bathroom he becomes a "smearer". His language has deteriorated. He has become a little more aggressive pulling any one's hair he can get close too. He has quit eating with a fork and spoon and now eats with his hands. Yesterday I gave him a bowl of cereal and without taking a bite he just turned it over and dumped it on the floor. He has started eating off of other peoples plates; he'll walk up to complete strangers at eating establishment or parties and just help himself. His moods and behavior can be very erratic. He becomes agitated more quickly and he screams and cries more often becoming inconsolable at times. He paces all day long and has a hard time sitting for more than a minute or two. He's started wandering off; I don't know how many times the neighbor or construction guy out front have had to bring him home. He refuses to go to primary; the crying starts the minute he hears it Sunday. He is having a harder time sleeping, both falling asleep and staying asleep. Sometimes he'll wake up in the middle of the night and lay on top of Millie or Owen pinning them down. He has put 3 phones and coutless other things in the toilet and the toilet is not even his first choice. I can't tell you how many things I've pulled out of the trash! This has been my summer. So, every doctor I've consulted with has agreed that two tests were in order, a MRI and an overnight EEG. Adam and I aren't confident that we'll get any real answers from these tests but at least we will be able to rule some things out. Autism is such a mysterious thing. 20-30 % of autistic kids show some form of regression in there lifetime but this number could be higher and the numbers a bit skewed because regression is a sign of autism so it's hard to know if it's a symptom or a sign. Kids with autism AND epilepsy have even a higher rate of regression. Ian is going backward. It's frustrating because I had one Dr. tell me that he'll never be normal. DUH! I'm not in denial! I don't need him to be normal. I just want to take my kids to the park without Ian pulling all the children's hair. I want to take them to McDonald's without him ripping hamburgers out of someones hand. I want to take them fishing without him screaming and crying until we just have to leave. I want to serve him a meal without having to bath him (and me, and the floor) after. I want him to use the toilet. I just want him to be the way he was a year ago; Hard but not impossible. Man I love this kid! But, I won't lie. The last 3 months have been the hardest, lonliest months of my life. It's funny, I've been told that Autism gets better every year. HA!