I cancelled my hotel room for Friday. I was in denial most of yesterday thinking that if I just got in to the chiropractor, physical therapist, SOMETHING that I would be OK for Saturday. I spent my whole morning on the phone in a panic arranging several different appointments. Last night Adam and I went to a movie and as I climbed the stairs to our seats with the stabbing pains in my lower back, I knew if was over. I couldn't even climb the stairs. Who was I kidding? There was no way I was gonna last 3 miles let alone 26. So, it's over. I spent a good deal crying and thinking how unfair it was. It's been a huge sacrifice for me and my family to train for this and I have to admit, I am not happy about giving up. I've even wondered if maybe I'm giving up too easily. But then I move and the pain zaps me back to reality. I think back to my last 20 mile run and how hard it was to run through the relatively mild back pain and knee pain I experienced. That was starting the run healthy with no pain. It's just not worth risking further damage. There will be other races and other marathons. I've proved to myself that I can do hard things and that I can push myself beyond what I thought I could. I can do it again. I am disappointed. More than you can know. But, that's what happens in life. Joy and Sorrow, pleasure and pain. It's just one more bump on the road of life. All I can do is keep driving.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
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5 people not afraid to say something:
I'm sorry! You will definitely have another chance though. Way to keep a good attitude about it. I really do hope you get better soon!
You are doing much better than I'd be doing! I think I'd be locked in my room by now and crying my eyes out. I just still can't believe it. I know there will be another day and maybe on that day we'll get to do it together. You really are amazing. I know the sacrifices you have made and I think you're amazing even more for being smart and not risk further injury. That is harder to do than running the marathon. I'll talk to you soon.
You're long term health isn't worth running before your body is healthy, Ang. You're training isn't going to waste, though. You'll get another chance, and then you will be ready and you'll out-do your goals for yourself.
Hang it there, and get well first. We'll still be cheering you on as you prepare for the one when your body is as ready as your mind to run 26.2!
Sniff, Sniff. I'm so amazed at you for making it this far. A couple years agoa I tried to train for a marathon but my knees started hurting so badly at mile 9 I never pushed passed it. Get yourself better and then let's train for another marathon together. For now, call me and let me know when Neil and I can watch your kids while you and Adam get away. You need a break!
Oh Ang, I missed you and was thinking of you! We both know you can do it and it's just a matter of time. The full mary is about YOU, not the race, you're right there will be other races, there's no sense injuring yourself since you're doing it for you anyway! LMK which one you decide on and maybe we can do some more long runs-think you'll be better for the halloween 5K? It's tradition now right? Chin up, the goal is still in sight. You are amazing and inspiring in soooo many ways--I'm proud of you!! (and I hope your back feels better)
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